The Meaningful Collateral

Pretty sure this is real and not staged or enhanced. Either way, man, does this look like it hurts!

My favorite story out of every training camp is the veteran who is “asked” not to come to training camp, but has millions of dollars waiting for if he shows up. Like his pride is going to get in the way of cashing that sort of paycheck.

Jason Jones of the Sacramento Bee reported that LaMont Jordan is not welcome even though the Raiders had numerous chances to resolve the issue — they could have released him last fall or made a move in the offseason. As it is, Jordan is due $4.7 million, which me may or may not spend updating his collection of bucket hats.

The standoffs aren’t really what amuse me as much as imagining what the details of the conversation actually are. Will they treat Jordan like Initech treated Milton in Office Space and slowly push him into the basement to run routes by himself?

Remember when Steve McNair was basically forced to sue the Titans to be allowed to workout while he was under contract. “Ah, yeah…Steve? What are you doing here? Didn’t you get the Bally’s membership we sent you? It’s the platinum membership. You can even use the lap pool.”

Give it up for Texas Tech head football coach Mike Leach: He might be the only man in America with something good to say about airlines or airports.

At Big XII (see, we’re cool and use your silly roman numeral thingy. Pay us the royalties now!) media day in Kansas City, Leach said the press could interview his two star players, Graham Harrell and Michael Crabtree, in Texas. How should they get to Lubbock? Well…

“I recommend (Dallas’s) Love Field because (Dallas/Ft. Worth Airport) can be a confusing mess,” Leach said. “Love Field, about every hour, goes to Lubbock, Texas, where we have some great steak places. And we’d love to see you”.

And that started a chain reaction where, for the first time in world history, an airport or airline actually responded to a complaint. DFW officials offered Leach a guided airport tour, a “great Texas steak” (good lord people, enough’s enough about the damn steaks!) and a complimentary flight through American Airlines from Lubbock to Dallas. Not only that, but DFW CEO Jeff Fegan and the entire executive team will meet Leach at the gate.

“While I know the season is upon us,” the nauseating press release said, “we would enjoy making this a fun event for you and your family. In fact, it might turn into an Airport tailgate!”.

Please, gag me someone.

To his credit, Leach said the offer was nice and he might just accept, if he has the time.

So mental note to everyone: You wanna find your lost luggage? You want an answer why it costs money for a sandwich? Just yell at a conference media day. Works like a charm.

The NBA has a foreseeable trend on their hands. Players are skipping out on mid-level contracts and taking the next flight to Europe. Recently, players Juan Carlos Navarro (Grizzlies), Carlos Delfino (Raptors), and Bostjan Nachbar (Nets) have all left the states for much “greener” pastures in Europe. Nachbar, a decent NBA competitor and perennial seventh man has accepted a contract offer from Dynamo Moscow worth nine million Euros over three years. This will equate to about $14.3 million. This size contract would be completely out of the question for Nachbar in the NBA considering his age, production, and inability to sell a jersey stitched with his name. Navarro will be returning to FC Barcelona, where he played ten seasons prior to coming to the NBA, while Delfino will be a member of Khimki BC of the Russian League.

This small (for now), yet eye-opening trend is unsettling to say the least. I realize the three players mentioned previously are all international players. However, while Brandon Jennings skips out on college to play in Europe for a year, it leaves me with an apprehensive feeling about the situation, even for American born players. I sincerely hope players get over there only to realize that this isn’t the way. But, let’s be for real. Midlevel NBA guys, in some situations, can make twice what they would make in the NBA. With the Euro still hovering around one and a half times the dollar, it would seem this decision should be a simple one. The way I see; these guys get a chance at stardom abroad, the opportunity to live in Europe (enough said), and get paid twice what they would in the states. As long as international basketball continues to grow in popularity and European franchises are willing to throw money at players like Nachbar, the NBA could be in trouble down the road.

Don’t be looking for Lebron in an FC wherever jersey, but if you like watching players like Navarro, you better get satellite. David Stern better hope the prestige of the NBA holds up enough to keep these mid-level, but contributing players.

Note to the Hillary fans: If these guys can be friends, you can vote for Obama.

When Louisville, Cincinnati and South Florida (as well as hoops-only DePaul and Marquette) bolted Conference USA for the Big East, Memphis was just a wee bit po’ed. After all, they play hoops well, and they play football (not quite as well, but let’s be fair: The Big East needed bodies more than quality teams when the ACC took Miami and Virginia Tech). And since the Tigers haven’t played Louisville, it’s rival for decades and decades, in just about anything.

Until now. Well, the future. Then now, rather.

According to the Memphis Commercial-Appeal, the Tigers and Cardinals are talking about a game in the 2009-10 season at Madison Square Garden. If so, it would not only match up two of the best programs in the country, but would be the first matchup since the Cards last game in Conference USA. What happened then?

Tiger fan might wanna look away.

To recap: The 2005 C-USA finals, Memphis down two with time running out, and while missing a 3-point shot, Darius Washington is fouled by Louisville’s Francisco Garcia. A win and Memphis goes to the tournament, a loss and they go to the NIT (apologies for the squeezed video. Squint your eyes - you’ll be fine):

From some high school martial arts event and, well, the roundhouse kick nearly decapitates this poor child. Grab your jaw …

We’re back with our semi-weekly collection of links from across SBA…and the world…

— In case you missed it, Buzz Bissinger apparently got beaten down at the Little League World Series. In front of his kids. Will Leitch is somewhere huddled in a corner, laughing his ass off. (Deadspin)

— Old and busted: Steel chairs, folding tables. New hotness: prosthetic limbs. Wait, what? (Busted Coverage)

— Norman Chad (a.ka. “The most unnecessary figure in sports journalism”) decides to weigh in on sports blogs. Ostensibly he found time to do this between his comedy lessons with the Sklar brothers. (Can’t Stop The Bleeding)

— Either A-Rod’s a pussy, or his friends are idiots…or, more than likely, both. (Shysterball)

— Rashard Mendenhall, none too pleased with the Zooker. (We Are The Postmen)

— A nostalgic look back at the funny sport commercials of yesteryear. (Legend of Cecilio Guante)

— Carson Palmer isn’t really fond of Ohio State fans. This should end well. (Fanhouse)

— Sounds like the University of Iowa really learned a lot from the Pierre Pierce fiasco. (Black Heart Gold Pants; Deadspin with the find)

There should be a point when enough is enough. Apparently we haven’t reached that yet with Spanish star Rafael Nadal.

So the interwebs tell me he’s got his own asteroid. In 2003, the Astronomical Observatory of Majorca (Spain, Rafa’s home) discovered the lovely asteroid numbered 128036, and, as they are allowed (finders keepers. Duh) they named the thing after Rafa.

Next time you’re traveling through the galaxy you can impress your friends with “Hey, that’s 128,036. Or as I like to say: The Rafa-roid!” (cue the oooooing).

The thing’s close to Jupiter, but situated between there and Mars, is four kilometers in diameter (I refuse to convert), travels 20 kilometers per second (see the previous) and frequently tugs on its ass while consistently wiping off its biceps.

I think.

Seen at an Albuquerque Isotopes minor-league baseball game. Guy on the right is Orbit, the team mascot and, wait, what is he … oh no. Orbit!

Oh geez: Call the team lawyers.

Perhaps we need to get Orbit into a rec league on Friday nights. Or possibly a babysitter.

Has tennis become so devoid of international (or really North American) star players it has to rely on guys retired for near ten years to promote one of it’s biggest events?

I guess I don’t really need to answer that.

The first night match at tonight’s Rogers Cup Masters Series event in Toronto? An exhibition. Around 6:45, Boris Becker, set to be inducted into the “Rogers Cup Hall of Fame” (not sure what that is) will play Canadian Daniel Nestor (if you don’t know him, Nestor is one of the greatest doubles players in ATP history; heck, because of the dearth of Canadian stars, guy even got a court named after him). The match will last an hour (the press release doesn’t say how it will be structured) before a real match begins at 8 p.m.

Becker, btw, has been retired since June 1999. Nestor’s highest ATP ranking was 58, way back in ‘99. His 2008 ATP singles record? 0-0.

Break out the champagne on this one - it gonna be exciting! More on the ATP Tour silliness after the jump. [Read more →]